Pain sucks. It just does. Today was one of those days — and it’s still going. I tried medication. I tried stretching. I tried a neck massage and a back massage. I tried a nap. I tried a detox bath. I tried sticky pain lotion. I tried more medication. I tried drinking a ton of water. I tried moist heat. And finally I just gave in and accepted the fact that my pain wasn’t going to budge.
Here are some things that make me roll my eyes when I’m in pain. Some of them might be TMI, but just whatever…. I have nothing to hide:
- I can’t even bend over to sit on the toilet without my head throbbing or my feet cramping up from holding my weight.
- It’s hard to connect the eye-hooks on my bra without my fingers cramping up.
- I clench my teeth in an effort to not frown, which has led to new problems in my jaw… awesome.
- I’m nauseated but I have to eat to take medications that should help me.
- My family is loud. The clock is loud. The air conditioner is loud. The fan is loud. It’s all TOO LOUD!
- Facebook posts make me roll my eyes. I’m happy for people and the fun they are having — just not at that particular moment. (just keepin it real)
Can you relate?
It’s after 9pm and I am starting to feel some relief. For all you non-chronic pain people, when I say “I feel some relief” it doesn’t mean I’m ready to take a lap around the block. It means I can walk across the room and get my own glass of water instead of asking for assistance. There is no miracle drug or therapy or food regimen for me (although being in the mountains seems to cure 95% of my ailments!). But do you know what gave me joy and was more calming and helpful than any of the things I tried today?
My husband said, “I’m so sorry you’re hurting like this today, honey.”
When he said that, I melted. In that instant, all of the following things went through my head — and again, if you’re a non-chronic pain person you might not understand where I’m coming from here, but hear me out:
- Thank GOD, he doesn’t think I’m faking this or think that I’m just lazy!
- He loves me and he cares about me.
- He can’t fix this, but it’s ok because I don’t expect him to.
If someone close to you is hurting from a chronic ailment PLEASE do not ignore her pain. I pray away Satan when I am in pain because he LOVES to whisper lies about me in hopes that I will believe him. He whispers things like:
- You’re so lazy, just get UP already and do something! You’re wasting the entire day!
- Why do you even bother trying to work? You aren’t reliable.
- You’re crabby all the time – you’re going to drive your husband away.
Satan isn’t creative, folks. He just hits my weak spots and digs right in. So stand in front of your loved one and don’t let Satan creep in. Crowd him out. Don’t attempt to fix everything, just tell her that you see her and you acknowledge that her pain is real. She knows you can’t fix her pain. She knows.
Pain is lonely. So don’t let her feel like she’s alone.
All you have to do is acknowledge her pain.